Saturday, July 26, 2008

Rant For Today

I was just sitting here minding my own business and who pops up on my television? One of the most annoying characters and ad-men television has ever produced - Billy Mays. His shrieking pitch and loud voice is ruining my Saturday. Yeah I know, change the channel. The problem is; once this fucker gets in your head he tends to stay there.

What the fuck is wrong with the advertising industry that makes them believe this loud obnoxious turd will be able to sell me anything? I could be in Hell and I wouldn't buy a glass of ice water from this clown.

And, as with most infomercials, just when you think they're over you hear good ole Billy say....But Wait! Then you get the "two for the price of one" bullshit. Jesus H. Christ, can't the advertising industry come up with something fresh - Please!

Okay. I'm finished.


Burnt Toast said...

Damnit man! This just reminded me of how badly I wanted to rip this guy apart in a post.

Several weeks ago I had to get up very early in the morning, right at the height of the paid advertising campaigns on the "off' channels.

Well, guess who the fuck was there hollerin' at me to buy something?? None other than Billy F'N Mays!!

But this time, it wasn't super bondo coffee cup fixer or gondo mondo car wash shammie nor the three cents a piece wall hangers for $19.99. . .it was fucking health insurance.

I kid you not. The sumbitch was hawking health insurance. I don't know if it was two for one, but I do recall staring at the television gape-mouthed and stunned by what I saw.

Would anyone in their right mind buy health insurance from this asshole? Especially at three in the morning????

Wait a sec. . .

nevermind. This is Amerika. Home of the brave and land of the incredibly under-educated. We spent our money on Miss Cleo once. . .

Greasywrench said...

What's amazing is the lack of creativity in advertising. You would think the suits in charge would change. Dan Akroyd got it right with the Bass-a-matic.

Ol' Billy just gets on my nerves. Health insurance? I guess the theory is after watching him you may need it.